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Dull bike

Journal Entry 31


-I’m telling you Teal’c, if we don’t find a way out of this soon, I’m going to lose it. Lose it. It means go crazy. Nuts. Insane. Bonzo. No longer in possession of one’s faculties. Three fries short of a happy meal. Wacko!!!

School today started with the classroom being locked again. So we stood around outside until we had to go to the all school meeting thing in the courtyard, for the oath taking/flag raising/prayer/singing bit of the day. Then we were left in the courtyard, waiting there in the already hot sun as the last class. It got to the point where I contemplated using my years of acting to my advantage, and pretending to pass out. Luckily, it was unnecessary. We were led into the now unlocked classroom to find it packed completely full of desks. 9X7, with a few more crammed into the corners, and more being slid in after us. I was told by the English teacher not to ask. I just smiled and nodded. But I was even more curious. Read the rest of this entry »

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Lils prancing

Journal Entry 23


-Alfie, why is there a sinister beeping coming from behind me?

Ok, time to stop trying to sleep and do something productive! * brushes hair for about two minutes * Well, in my defense, I really need sleep to deal with today’s shit. Nataly’s cousin wandered in when they did, last night, at eleven pm. So glad I did not go with them. There would have been Hell then, instead of just last night and this morning. Well, about eleven, they come into the room, where I am pretending to sleep, not wanting to talk. I notice a second person, and because Elizabeth isn’t supposed to show up until today, I played the peeking game for a while. It was Nataly’s cousin, whose mom I wrote about a while back, the one who was making recycled flower pots and stuff. They turned on the light, and of course, I get an itch from one of the bug bites on my shin. But I really don’t want them to know that I am awake. They get ready for bed, turn off the light, rustle around looking for something, turn the light back on, find it, and turn off the light, sharing Nataly’s bottom bunk. Okay, I’ll finally get some sleep. Read the rest of this entry »

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Night in Panama

Journal Entry 20


-Last night I lay in bed and looked up at the stars in the sky, and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?

Today has been another bad day. My stomach has been killing me all day, and we are experiencing another power outage. On the plus side, it’s raining. On one part of the downside, they still won’t let me play in the rain, because they are afraid that I will get sick. I am a Humboldt girl. All of my classmates will remember about how all of the school that was able to get out of class, or had no class, would go stand outside in the rain. Stand, look up at the sky like chickens, play in the puddles, laugh. Here, no one laughs, they just huddle beneath structures and hide. I cannot live like this. Read the rest of this entry »

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Touch me and die

Journal Entry 19


-I did not trip and fall. I attacked the floor and I believe that I am winning.

Today was another abnormal school day. All we’ve done is do a skit, and now we seem to be playing dress-up. Or maybe it’s Have Lillie Strip In The Classroom And Put On A God-Awful Dress Thing. Which is way too tight in the shoulders. You know, either one works. And, sorry, but boys, hands off my fucking buttons. Unless we have been dating for quite a while, you will not take off my shirt for me. And definitely not at school. I do not need boys to help me change my clothes. Fuck, I don’t need anyone. I’m a big girl now, and I’ve figured out that 98% of the time, the left shoe does in fact go on the left foot. That extra 2% is usually for fun. Or just to fuck with someone.

My hair is all gross and stringy, and it smells really bad. Who am I kidding, I smell bad. My hands get all oily just brushing against my hair, and it looks all wet and shiny in the mirror, which I have taken to avoiding. I need a fucking shower with real water. And I need a flushing toilet. My plan before I left the States was to stick it out for three months. It seemed reasonable. Read the rest of this entry »

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